Grammar Gripes & Tips

I'd rather be a comma

Than a full stop.

- "Every Teardrop Is A Waterfall” (Coldplay, 2011)

I feel good, 

I knew that I would.

- "I Got You" (James Brown, 1965)

Ever since I started blogging I always assumed there would be two constants supplying a limitless trove of post topics: movies and sports.  Until this past mid-March, several new movies hit the silver screen every week, and there was rarely a time when a professional, college or high school game of some sort was not at hand.  Those have been the mainstays of The Quentin Chronicle since its inception eight and a half years ago.  Now with the coronavirus and all the sadness and mayhem it brings, we are in uncharted waters.  My two reliable wells for fodder have run dry for the time being.

In view of the foregoing, I thought I would go back to a topic I've visited only twice before, on January 19 and February 21, 2012.  That topic is grammar, although this time I'm narrowing it to pet peeves and helpful tips.  Before we go any further, though, I suggest you reread the first paragraph of my January 19, 2012 post, in which I admit I'm throwing caution to the wind.  Fools rush in!

In pre-blog days I made a sporadic practice of sending grammar tips to my three kids.  I referred to those unsolicited emails as the "Sister Jane Memos," named in honor of my tremendous sixth grade teacher at St. Joe's in Libertyville.  Teaching English was her forte, and her lessons have stuck with me over the decades.  One of her favorite tools was diagramming sentences, a practice which went out with the Paleolithic Era.  Those were the days!  Luckily for my kids, I never foisted a diagramming exercise upon them.  

I was also blessed to have had a fantastic professor for "freshman comp" at Notre Dame.  Joseph Ryan, affectionately referred to as "Easy Joe," was a retired newspaperman for the Chicago Tribune.  One of the few lay profs who lived on campus, he resided in Lyons Hall.  Easy Joe might have been a lenient grader -- hence the nickname -- but he made you work for your "A."  There were many instances when I would undertake several drafts of a composition before submitting what I felt was practically a masterpiece.  I was wrong each time.  Easy Joe must have kept the bookstore's red pen sales robust as he'd mark up my paper and those of my classmates as only a veteran newspaper scribe could do.  Some of what he wrote in red were corrections; most were suggestions.  It was humbling because, doggone it, he was always right.

Now that I've dispensed with the preamble, it is time to move on to my list of ten items.  I've chosen "ten" because it is a nice round number.  In keeping with the title of this post I'm offering five gripes and five tips.  Take them or leave them as you wish, but here is a caveat:  Sister Jane and Easy Joe would agree with me.

[I have placed a bold-printed EX in front of examples below.] 

GRIPES

 1.  A comma is not a period.  I remember Sister Jane spending a good twenty or thirty minutes teaching us how to use a period to end our declarative sentences.  "What a simple idea," I thought to myself.  "What could be easier than ending a declarative sentence with a period?"  (It is such an elementary concept that I would not be surprised to learn that my third grade teacher, Miss Flanigan, taught the same lesson, although I have no precise recollection of that.)  And yet, there are certain acquaintances of mine whose M.O. is to end many declarative sentences with a comma, or else no punctuation at all.  I keep hoping this repeated mistake is more a product of treating email correspondence as super casual.  Mistaking a comma for a period seems to have become more common every year.  No wonder Coldplay had a hit with Waterfall.  Come on, people.  Use a period to end your declarative sentences.

On a related issue, here is an addendum to Gripe # 1.  Sometimes I see a writer place a question mark after a declarative sentence.  Such a writer confuses declarative sentences with interrogatories when a verb like "wonder" or "seems" is used.  Here is an example:

EX  I wonder if the Norske Nook has any butterscotch cream pie today?

That is a declarative sentence because it states a fact, namely, "I wonder."  Therefore, the question mark should be replaced by a period. 

2.  You either feel good or bad.  Apparently there is little love for the Godfather Of Soul, James Brown.  People seem to be reluctant to say or write, “I feel good” or "I am good" if, in fact, they do feel good. They are more likely to respond to the rhetorical greeting “How are you?” by saying “I am well.”  Some of this incorrect practice I attribute to their sense of hearing.  Using "well" might sound better than using "good."  The phenomenon is similar to what I wrote about using the pronoun "me."  Once again I refer you to my January 19, 2012 post, Don't Be Afraid To Use Me. 

As a general rule, "good" is an adjective and "well" is an adverb.  (Some grammarians have caved on this topic, surrendering to the hoi polloi by deciding that "well" could be either an adjective or an adverb.  To borrow a phrase attributed to Sir Winston Churchill, my response to this capitulation is "Poppycock!")  A "be verb," such as the word "am," can not be modified by an adverb because "am" does not show action.  If a sentence starts out with a subject followed by a "be verb," what comes next is either a predicate nominative (which is a noun or a pronoun) or a predicate adjective (which, as luck would have it, is an adjective).  There is no such thing as a predicate adverb.

As used in the sentence "I feel good," the word "feel" is functioning as a "be verb," not an "action verb."  It shows state of being, not action.  Therefore use the predicate adjective "good."  [Note: It is permissible to write or state "I am doing well," because "doing" is an action verb and therefore may be followed by an adverb such as "well."]

3.  "There" can't be a subject.  Here is another basic rule which Miss Flanigan was just as likely to have introduced as was Sister Jane.  Only nouns and pronouns can function as the subject of a sentence.  The word "there" is neither a noun nor a pronoun.  Therefore, it can't be the subject of a sentence.  The number (singular or plural) of the subject determines whether you need a singular or plural verb.  An example follows:

EX  There are sixteen trees in the orchard.

The subject of that sentence is "trees."  Yet, many people would state, "There's sixteen trees in the orchard."  Why is that wrong?  The answer is since the subject, "trees," is plural, it requires a plural verb.  Yet, the contraction "there's" stands for "there is."  The verb "is" is singular.  In a nutshell, here is the lesson:  Don't start your sentence with the contraction "There's" if the subject is plural.

EX  Okay:  There's a car parked in the driveway.

EX  Not okay: There's two cars parked in the driveway.

EX  The second sentence should be this: There are two cars parked in the driveway.

EX  Also acceptable: There're two cars parked in the driveway.

4.  A dash should not be used for apposition.  This gripe frequently comes into focus when I read the Star Tribune.  The Strib writers like to use a dash immediately prior to an identification.  It's possible the Strib's style manual allows that.  That is too bad.  Here is an example:

EX  Minnesota's two United States senators -- Amy Klobuchar and Tina Smith -- are home during the congressional recess.

A better practice would be to use parentheses or, better yet, commas instead of dashes.  Dashes should be reserved for showing sudden change of direction either in the middle or at the end of a sentence.

Here is an example of using dashes properly:

EX  The current post describes a phenomenon -- I hesitate to call it an oddity -- to which I was introduced when my family moved to Iowa.

That example may look familiar to you if you read my March 28 post, First Name Initial.

The lesson: Don't use dashes for apposition.

5.  Couldn't care less.  Almost every time I hear someone say "I could care less" what they really mean, judging by context, is they could not care less.  Capiche?  

TIPS

A. Punctuation pairs.  One of the important exercises when proof reading is to make sure that every opening punctuation mark which is supposed to be followed by a closing punctuation mark has, in fact, been so followed.  Such marks obviously include quotation marks, parentheses and brackets.  They always come in pairs.  But, not always as obvious would be some commas and mid-sentence dashes.  Check out the following example:

EX  Some of the men who did not participate in the mutiny, including Roger Byam, the narrator of the novel remained on the Bounty because there was no room for them on the launch.

Did you figure out what's missing?  There should be a comma after the word "novel."  The phrase "the narrator of the novel" is an appositive which further identifies Roger Byam.  Mid-sentence appositives need to be separated from the rest of the sentence by commas.

B. Semi-colons in lists.  Lists are often preceded by colons, with the list items separated by commas.

EX  I have sailed on the five Great Lakes: Superior, Huron, Michigan, Erie and Ontario.

However, if one (or more) list item itself contains a comma, a good practice is to use semi-colons (instead of commas) for separation.

EX  I have sailed on the five Great Lakes: Superior, the largest of the five; Huron, on which enchanting Mackinac Island resides; Michigan, the only Great Lake entirely within the United States; Erie, often associated with the 1969 fire on the Cuyahoga River; and Ontario, directly connected to the St. Lawrence Seaway.  

C.  Consistent identification.  This is more pertinent for formal writing, but still a worthy piece of advice.  Once a proper noun has been introduced, use the same means of identification throughout your paper.  This is especially important if your paper is relatively long and includes several proper nouns which may not be familiar to your reader.  Your selection of an identifier can be placed in quotes inside parentheses.

EX  I met General Charles F. Wald when he was a high school sophomore.

If that is the first of several times you're going to refer to that person, then decide how you are going to identify him and stick to it.  Don't write "the general," "Wald," "Charles," "Chuck" or "CFW" at various places.  Instead, pick one such as "Wald," and then stick to it.

EX  I met General Charles F. Wald ("Wald") when he was a high school sophomore. 

Sometimes this hint applies to common nouns.  For example, if you are writing about a construction project you can identify it as the "Project."  Then, every time you reference that construction project you can simply write "the Project."  

EX  The construction project associated with the light rail expansion (the "Project") is causing traffic delays on Beltline Boulevard. 

EX  My flight from Boston to Tahiti had layovers in Los Angeles (the "First Layover") and Honolulu (the "Second Layover").    

Bonus Tip:  I always appreciate it when the author of a long article refreshes our memory of who a previously identified person is.  I hate having to search backwards in a long article trying to recall who someone is, especially if that person was only mentioned once near the beginning.  

EX  O’Malley, the next door neighbor, claimed she heard a single gunshot around 3:00 a.m.

Voila!  Now we know who O'Malley is without having to go back toward the beginning of the article.  She is the next door neighbor.

D. Starting sentences with "I".  It's a good practice to avoid starting a plethora of sentences with the word "I."  Sometimes it's unavoidable, but most of the time a little minor surgery on sentence structure can do the corrective trick, resulting in more variety.  One simple exercise is to precede the subject, "I," with an adjective phrase.

Instead of this:

EX  I registered as an independent to avoid divulging my true party preference.

Try this:

EX  Not wishing to divulge my true party preference, I registered as an independent.

Perhaps infrequent use of passive voice serves a useful purpose as well.  Contrary to what many of us have been taught, passive voice should not always be considered taboo.  Just don't overdo it.

Instead of this:

EX  I obtained a premium discount for my accident-free driving record.

Try this:

EX  A premium discount was offered to me for my accident-free driving record.

E. Trimming "that".

My writing practice for a first draft is to use the word "that" with abandon to introduce phrases and clauses, but then attempt to delete "that" when I do a redraft.

EX  First draft: I have come to the conclusion that the New England Patriots and the Houston Astros are cheaters.

EX  Second draft: I have come to the conclusion the New England Patriots and the Houston Astros are cheaters.

Here is the lesson:  If you can trim the word "that" from a sentence without changing the meaning or causing confusion, do so.

Disclosure:  I have a particularly tough time adhering to D and E.  But as noted philosopher John Selden wrote, "Do as I say, not as I do."  

Scorecard Cheating

Here is the little story that came to mind this week after viewing a short video by Tim Kurkjian, a nationally known baseball journalist and television analyst.  Kurkjian reveals how, for eleven years, he clipped and saved baseball box scores.  It was only after newspapers generally stopped printing box scores that Kurkjian had to discontinue his hobby.  For some reason, I have a related practice, hanging on to my scorecards from games I attended.  Occasionally I even keep score at home for World Series games of particular interest, e.g., Cubs vs. Indians in Game # 7 of the 2016 World Series.

My dad told me when I was about 10 or 11 that if you are lucky enough to attend an MLB game, you should never leave until the last out is made.  "If you leave early, you might miss the best play of the game."

I have followed his rule for almost 100% of the games I've attended over the years.  However, I did have to make an exception last year on July 17.  It was a Wednesday afternoon game, Twins vs. New York Mets, and Momma Cuandito accompanied me to the game.  As I've probably related before, she has become a true Twins fan, but her worst nightmare is having a game she's at go into extra innings.  In other words, she's down for about three hours of baseball, but then she is ready to move on.

As the Twins-Mets game evolved it looked like it was going to be a real barn burner.  After six innings, the Twins led 3-2.  Twins starting pitcher Martin Perez was on his game.  One of the Mets' two runs was unearned (E-5 by Miguel Sano), and Perez had 4 strike outs.  He had given up just 1 walk (plus a hit batsman).  Unfortunately, Twins manager Rocco Baldelli decided to let his esteemed bullpen get the last 9 outs.  Trevor May promptly surrendered the lead, giving up 3 runs on 3 hits in the top of the 7th.  Then Matt Magill came in to pitch the top of the 8th; what a disaster!  The Mets scored 6 more runs, all unearned thanks to an E-7 by Eddie Rosario.  Going into the bottom of the 8th it was 11-3 Mets.  We hung around to watch the Twins bat in the bottom of the 8th, and they did manage to come up with 1 run to make it 11-4.  Then we did what most of the other 35,124 fans did: we left.  Although she didn't say it, I knew Momma Cuan wanted to leave, and I did too.  Sure, it was breaking my dad's rule, but for all intents and purposes the game was over.

Not quite!

That evening I learned that the final score was 14-4.  Rocco, in an effort to save bullpen arms, allowed reserve infielder Ehire Adrianza to pitch the 9th.  The Mets shelled him for 5 hits and 3 runs.

As a saver of scorecards, it bothered me that my scorecard stopped after the 8th inning.  But, it didn't bother me to the point where I did anything about it, until this week!  I decided to look up the play-by-play for that game on baseball-reference.com, a terrific website on which a baseball enthusiast could literally waste an entire day.  It only took me about 4 or 5 minutes to find what I'd been looking for.  Then, I filled in the 9th inning on my scorecard which (of course) I had saved from that game.  That is what I call "Scorecard Cheating."  Hopefully neither the baseball gods, nor my father, will judge me too harshly.

****

There is a an epilogue to my story, having to do with baseball's so-called unwritten rules.  Many of you, especially those who've read my October 31, 2019 post (World Series 2019: Highs And Lows), are familiar with those rules, almost all of which are precipitated by sportsmanship.  For example, don't bunt in the late innings to break up a pitcher's no hitter.  Don't steal a base in the late innings if your team is up by 7 (an arbitrary number).  Under similar circumstances, don't unnecessarily stretch a single into a double or go from first to third if your teammate singles after you.  Likewise, don't work a count, hoping to draw a walk, if the game is out of reach, etc.

As I wrote above, my dad never left a game early for fear of missing "the best play of the game."  Today we would call those defensive masterpieces "web gems."  To my knowledge, when Momma Cuan and I left the Twins-Mets blowout last July 17, we did not miss a web gem, but we did miss an extremely strange implementation of an unwritten rule.

According to the play-by-play provided on baseball-reference.com, here is what happened when the Mets, leading 11-4, batted in the top of the 9th inning facing the Twins' new "pitcher," Adrianza.

- The Mets' DH Robinson Cano, batting in the 5 hole, lined out to right. (1 out, nobody on)

- # 6 hitter Todd Frazier singled to right. (1 out, man on 1st)

- # 7 hitter Michael Conforto singled to right, moving Frazier to third. (1 out, runners at the corners)

- # 8 hitter Amed Rosario tripled to left, scoring Frazier and Conforto.  The score is now 13-4. (1 out, man on third)

- # 9 hitter Adeiny Hechavarria doubled to left, scoring Rosario.  The score is now 14-4. (1 out, man on second)

- # 1 hitter Juan Lagares (who had entered the game as a defensive replacement in the 8th inning) doubled to left, 

moving Hechavarria to third.  (1 out, runners on second and third)

- # 2 hitter Dominic Smith struck out swinging. (1 out, runners on second and third)

- # 3 hitter Pete Alonso grounded out to third to end the inning.  The score remains 14-4, which became the final score when the Twins failed to score in the bottom of the 9th.

So there you have it.  The Mets decided not to allow their runner (Hechavarria) to score from second on a double to left field.  I don't believe I have ever seen a play like that.  If I had followed my dad's rule, I would have.  The Mets took an unwritten rule to an extreme, would you agree?

I'm sure the Mets' intention was good sportsmanship, but you also have to wonder if, by not letting Hechavarria score, it was more of a humiliation for the Twins.

Quarterly Cinema Scan - Volume XXXIX

The dearly departed movie critic Roger Ebert wrote in the Chicago Sun Times that he wanted to watch The English Patient twice, once to formulate his questions and another to figure out the answers.  I did watch The English Patient for the second time a couple of weeks ago and decided that I need to see it a third time to feel confident in the answers I came up with.  Why, you might ask, would I be willing to submit myself to yet another viewing of a film lasting over two and a half hours just for the sake of tying up a few puzzling loose ends?  You might call it a labor of love.

Having "said" that, I still must admit I grappled with the question of whether the film deserves an A- or an A.  Immediately after my second viewing I made a mental note that this was an A- movie, certainly one of the best I expect to see this year.  But as the following days went by I could not get the movie out of my head, notwithstanding the fact that I watched a couple of other movies in the interim.  Such is a characteristic of an A movie.  So many scenes made a lasting imprint, with credit going to the leading players (identified below) under the direction of Anthony Minghella, who also wrote the screenplay, plus the breathtaking cinematography of John Seale.

The most surprisingly effective element of The English Patient is the use of flashbacks.  I've written before, in fact as recently as January 29, that I am not typically fond of temporal scene shifting or flashbacks, especially if they appear to be a choice used by the director for nothing more than artistic reasons.  The 1992 novel by Michael Ondaatje and the adapted screenplay by Minghella contain such a plethora of flashbacks that the film's editor, the brilliant Walter Murch, admitted he dreaded the project.  That may have been false modesty by Murch, as he was the man called upon to edit The Godfather Trilogy.  Indeed, Murch might be the MVP of The English Patient's production.

Ever since watching my all-time favorite film, 1942's Casablanca, I have become a self-declared sucker for cinema romance, especially those like Casablanca and The Winds Of War (a 1983 television miniseries) against the backdrop of war.  In the sub-genre of wartime romance, The English Patient belongs in the upper tier.

****

Here are the movies I watched at The Quentin Estates in this year's first quarter. 

1. Bombshell  (2019 biodrama; Charlize Theron/Megan Kelly, a prime time Fox News anchor, considers whether to step forward in support of Nicole Kidman/Gretchen Carlson’s sexual harassment lawsuit against Fox CEO John Lithgow/Roger Ailes.)  B-

2. Death On The Nile (1978 mystery; Peter Ustinov, as the internationally famous sleuth Hercule Poirot, joins forces with David Niven, a former division head for the British government's spy agency, to solve a murder on a Nile River cruise steamer on which almost every passenger is a suspect.). A-

3. The Doors (1991 biodrama; Val Kilmer/Jim Morrison, a poet turned accidental rock god, destroys his career and life with drugs and booze.)  C+

4. The English Patient (1996 drama; at the end of World War II Ralph Fiennes, a critically injured Hungarian count, is cared for in a bombed out Italian monastery by Canadian nurse Juliette Binoche, to whom he recounts the story of his love affair with Kristin Scott Thomas.)  A

5. Red Sparrow (2018 spy drama; Jennifer Lawrence is a manipulated Russian agent who is assigned to develop a relationship with CIA agent Joel Edgerton for the purpose of identifying the Americans’ mole in the Kremlin.)  C+

6. Richard Jewell  (2019 biodrama; Paul Walter Hauser plays Richard Jewell, a security guard and cop wanna be, who is unethically named as a suspect by Atlanta journalist Olivia Wilde based on an unsubstantiated tip from FBI inspector John Hamm.)  B-

7. Shakespeare In Love (1998 dramedy; Joseph Fiennes as young Will Shakespeare falls in love with beautiful Gwyneth Paltrow, who becomes his muse and co-star in the production of his play, originally titled Romeo & Ethel, The Pirate’s Daughter.)  B+

8. Valentine’s Day (2010 rom-com; Astin Kutcher, Jennifer Garner, Jamie Fox and Jessica Beale are some of the LA residents whose love lives undergo changes on Valentine’s Day.)  B-

First Name Initial

I wear it at the soda shop, wear it at the record hop,

Ridin' to a movie in your jeep,

I wear it when I go to gym, wear it when I take a swim,

I even wear it when I sleep.

- First Name Initial (Annette, 1959)

Two recent occurrences have combined to inspire my offering of this post: the start of a new decade a few months ago, and the recounting of my Iowa newspaper story here on February 3 (A Case Of Mistaken Identity).  This current post describes a phenomenon -- I hesitate  to call it an oddity --  to which I was introduced when my family moved to Iowa at the start of my eighth grade second semester.

***

As we approached the final days of the “10’s” last December, many critics and commentators treated us to Top Ten lists for that decade in all kinds of categories such as movies, athletes and athletic achievements, books, inventions, medical discoveries, Supreme Court cases, television shows, music and the like. The offering of lists in similar fashion is traditional at the end of virtually every decade. We also see near the close of each decade summaries of fads and trends which appeared, with varying degrees of shelf life, during those periods.  For example, according to the website bestlifeonline.com, some of the most noteworthy fads and trends during the “10’s” included the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge, Pokemon Go, the dance craze Flossing, and Words With Friends.  In preparation for this post, I asked my crack three person research team to google "fads and trends from the 1950's."  They came up with soda fountains, poodle skirts, hula hoops and long sideburns, among others, while a search for the early sixties gave us The Twist, mohair sweaters, penny loafers (with an actual penny inserted on the top notch), surf music and girl groups.

To my surprise, the fad which immediately greeted me when I arrived in Iowa in January of '61 did not show up on our exhaustive (?) searches: to wit, first name initials.  How could there be such a glaring omission of a fad which stands out as a clear memory from my grade school days?  Was the omission of first name initials due to that fashion accessory being strictly "an Iowa thing"?  No, and I'll tell you why momentarily, but first, a little background.

In my August 25, 2012 post (Chrome Dome & The Cub Reporter) I made brief mention of the co-ed condition in the two Catholic schools I attended during eighth grade.  In short, St. Joe's in Libertyville had two co-ed eighth grade rooms, while Our Lady Of Lourdes in Bettendorf also had two rooms of eighth graders, but they were separated by gender.  Ironically, among the eighty or so eighth graders in St. Joe’s co-ed setting, there was only one couple which could legitimately be deemed to have a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship.  True, there were some girls in my class who took it upon themselves to "make matches" theoretically.  (This may have been the precursor to on-line dating.)  But, those were almost pure figments of the girls’ imaginations.  We must not have had many homework assignments in those days, because the girls who concocted these hypothetical pairings seemed to have all kinds of time on their hands.  My so-called match at St. Joe's was Joan Iaconetti.  Joan was a pleasant, intelligent young lady with sparkling eyes, but we rarely had a conversation in person, and most definitely not by phone.  I'm not even sure we were in the same eighth grade classroom.

When I arrived in Iowa the set up at Lourdes was quite different.  Not only were almost half of the guys and girls paired up in a real life amorous or at least quasi-amorous relationship, but many of the girls wore a first name initial pin indicating the object of their affection.  My first reaction, especially coming from St. Joe's apparently less-than-hip background, was that this was among  the craziest things I had ever encountered.  I had heard of high school upperclassmen giving their steady date their class ring, but in 1961 that would be at least a few years down the road for me and my fellow eighth graders.  Back in Libertyville, we guys spent our recess and lunch breaks playing ball in the park across the street, or else shooting marbles or pitching pennies against the church steps.  The concept of talking to a girl would be the farthest thing from our minds, and they probably felt the same way about us.

Lourdes was a whole other scenario.  There, the girls and guys spent a good chunk of their free time pairing up either alone or in small groups to socialize.  There was no guessing which guy "went with" which girl; all you had to do was look at the girl's first name initial pin, proudly worn on her uniform sweater.  Maybe the fact that the boys and girls were in segregated classrooms -- missing each other? -- accounted for some of the pin popularity, or perhaps another reason described in the next few paragraphs provided the answer.

***

During the last five years of the fifties, kids across the country grew up on The Mickey Mouse Club television show.  My sister, Michele, and I faithfully watched it when we came home from school.  The nationally syndicated show had a different theme for each day, like Music Day, Western Day, and the ever-mysterious Anything Can Happen Day.  The hour long show was hosted by an adult, Jimmie Dodd, but the real stars of the program were the Mouseketeers.  This group of ten or twelve girls and boys were the entertainers, singing, dancing and performing short skits which went along with that day's theme.  Although they were mostly young teenagers, the youngsters became national celebrities, wearing Mouseketeer caps, complete with rigid round ears, and white turtleneck sweaters with their first names printed across the chest.

Annette Funicello, or simply "Annette," was arguably the fan favorite.  Although each of the Mouseketeers was a very talented child performer, Annette had the most versatile and lengthy career, both as a singer and a (mostly) B-film actress.  Michele, always in tune with pop culture, bought a couple of Annette's '45's, and maybe even an album. During 1959 and 1960, Annette had four Top 20 hits on the Billboard Hot 100, including Tall Paul (peaking at # 7), O Dio Mio (# 10) and Pineapple Princess (# 11); plus, the key song germane to this post, First Name Initial (# 20).  That song, a quintessential statement of puppy love written by Martin Kalmanoff and Aaron Schroeder, expresses a girl's excitement for wearing her boyfriend's first name initial, a symbol for the world to see that the lucky guy belongs to her. 

And now for the mystery.  Could it be that the origin of the Iowa girls' fascination with first name initials was a derivative of the Annette song?  Probably, but if so, two questions.  First, why hadn't the Illinois girls latched on to this trend?  Listening to Top 40 music on WLS radio was a common pastime throughout Chicagoland, including Libertyville.  Surely the St. Joe's girls were familiar with Annette's hit song.  Maybe they were behind the cultural times compared to their Iowa sisters.  Or, more likely, maybe the male pickings at St. Joe's (at least the Class of '61) were so slim that the girls decided an outlaying of the eight or ten smackers for a pin to identify a guy was a waste of money.  

Second, First Name Initial made its debut on the Billboard charts on October 26, 1959.  It remained on the Hot 100 for eighteen weeks (far longer than the average Top 40 hit), taking us all the way to, roughly, the first week of March, 1960, almost an entire year before I arrived in Bettendorf.  Had the Lourdes girls been wearing first name initials all that time?  Most fashion fads ran their course long before that.  Perhaps the girls were just waiting for another popular style to come along to take the place of first name initials.  If one ever did show up in Bettendorf, it did not arrive until some time after mid-summer 1961.

***

At first I could not have cared less that a bunch of my female classmates were wearing the first name initial of their purported -- and probably actual -- boyfriend.  I viewed the practice as curious and quirky, but always kept in mind that I was the new kid on the block.  I was not about to ridicule or disparage their choices.  But then things got more personal.  One day either Michele or one of my buddies pointed out to me that a girl in my class, Cynthia Saldivar, was wearing a "J" pin on her sweater, and the word on the street was that the "J" was for me.  How could this be?  Aside from perhaps making eye contact once or twice, we had never spoken to each other.  Then to make matters more uncomfortable, Judy Pfaff, the girlfriend of my best friend Greg McCluskey and one of Cynthia's best friends, started to put the pressure on me to acknowledge the nascent, albeit fictional, relationship.  "Why don't you call her?  Why don't you eat lunch with her?  Why don't you hold her hand?"  Oh boy.  This was new territory for me.  Nothing against Cynthia, who was very pretty -- hopefully not coming off here as being shallow -- but I really didn't want to make the effort to meet her even half way.  That would be a waste of my time and hers.  Besides, I had my eye on a different girl, a seventh grader named Connie Foster who looked like Suzanne Pleshette.  (Cue Paul Simon's Kodachrome?)

***

We now have arrived at the end.  Cynthia and I became cordial friends, but nowhere near "an item."  Following eighth grade graduation I don't recall ever seeing her again.  In any event, she went on to Bettendorf High School for ninth grade, while I attended Assumption High in Davenport.

As for Suzanne... I mean Connie, it never got out of first gear.  It probably took me until early spring to work up the courage to talk to her.  We ran into each other a handful of times during the summer, but the vibe I got did not make me optimistic about the prospects.  What little hope there was for me came to a crashing halt right after classes began my freshman year at Assumption.  One early September morning I was on the school bus heading for Davenport when a sophomore came up and started to shove me backwards.  I shoved back, we both traded punches, and then some upperclassmen quickly broke it up.  That sophomore turned out to be Larry Foster, Connie's brother.  I obviously don't know what version of the story Larry told Connie, but I guess he was convincing.  I was unable to connect with her by phone.  Then, I remember mailing her a note on a card.  As the Beatles once sang, no reply.   

[Note: For the next exciting chapter on my Iowa love life, be sure to check out my July 15, 2015 post, Driving Miss Linda.]

Keeping In Touch With The Big Kids

Momma Cuandito and I retuned home last Wednesday from a twenty-four day road trip to Florida, where we've enjoyed a relatively brief respite of winter warmth approximately nine of the last ten years.  Our two favorite spots are Anna Maria Island off the coast of Bradenton, and Fort Myers, the spring training home of the Minnesota Twins.  This most recent trip was by car, the fourth time we've chosen that means of transportation.

We don't kill ourselves to get to or from Florida.  That would defeat the purpose of opting for the highway over the sky way.  Some folks drive through the night, changing drivers and making a beeline from one state to the next.  That's not us.  Although we might have at least one day which involves around six hundred miles of daylight travel, we make up for it by spending two nights in a row once or twice at pre-selected sites.  This year those places going south were Georgetown, Kentucky (a remote suburb of Lexington) and Lake City, Florida.

Not to short change our three kids and their spouses, but as is true with many traveling grandparents, the biggest downside to being away from home is the absence of our grandchildren.  There are few hours in a typical day when I don't think about the four of them, whom I sometimes refer to as the Gorgeous Creatures.  I don't know that MC and I could ever relocate south for the entire winter knowing that the Gorgeous Creatures were an airplane ride, as opposed to a few minutes, away.

When Momma Cuan and I are on the road, I like to imagine that our kids are thinking about us, wondering where we are and what we're up to.  To a large extent that may be fanciful thinking; they have their own families to attend to.  Still, I keep in touch with them from the road by sending (usually) short emails from my phone.  When you’re a ham-handed non-typist using a phone, the brevity of correspondence is dictated. Once in awhile the recipients reply.  The emails, like photographs, also serve as memory joggers if I read what I've sent at a later date.  Full disclosure: I already have, and probably will again.

Today, March 15, was supposed to be the date of our eighth annual Fours & Field Contest party, celebrating the NCAA's Selection Sunday for March Madness.  (For a refresher on what the Fours & Field Contest is all about, check out my February 24, 2013 post.  The FFC has been enlarged and modified since then, but the basic principles described therein remain in place.)  Instead, Momma Cuan and I are sitting around the house, social distancing ourselves from the rest of humanity.  It's a predicament brought on by the coronavirus threat.  There is nothing good on TV, and the book I'm reading is an easy one to put down.  This might be a good time to post on my blog, which I've been known to label my "SR&LRB" (an inside joke).  The topic I've chosen is the path requiring the least amount of thought: the aforementioned emails.  There are eleven of them.

****

Feb 17    HELLO FROM CHAMPAIGN

Hello boys & girls,

I know you’re worried sick about us, but we did make it to Champaign, 514 miles from the QE.  Home of the U of Illinois.  Once we got to Tomah it was all snow and rain.  We got here at 5:30. Staying at Drury Inn, where they give you 2 free drinks. I had scotch on the rocks. The amount of booze in a drink is < a thimbleful.  Ate dinner at a brew pub downtown, Destihl.  Maybe the best beef stroganoff I’ve ever had.  Washed it down with a 6.7% hazy IPA and a 9.1% Scotch ale, both made by Destihl. Tomorrow we head to Lexington, only 312 miles from here. Hi to JB, RM, JM, LJ, WJ, LR, UL, R and P.  I love you all.

The Old Illinoisan

****

Feb 18    HELLO FROM GEORGETOWN

Hello Boys & girls,

We drove 308 miles from Champaign to Georgetown, which is about 20 miles north of Lexington. On the way we stopped for lunch at Mac & Don’s in Seymour, Indiana, the home town of John Mellencamp.

Georgetown has a historic downtown with buildings even more ancient than your old man.  Went to a brew pub called My Old Kentucky Foam. I had a nitro brown ale and a pale with high IBUs.  The bartender was an authority on just about everything. For dinner we went to a place called Fava’s. I had a traditional KY casserole which the locals call Hot Brown. Meh. Mom had catfish. Meh. I had butterscotch cream pie, my usual favorite but in this case, Meh.

We finished the night with a couple of Bushmills on the rocks at the only Irish pub in town, Slainte Public House.

Tomorrow will present a challenge for Mom and me: Trying not to step in horse kah kah when we tour nearby WinStar Horse Farm. Word to the SOs, the Gorgeous Creatures and the pets. I love you all.

The Old Equestrian

****

Feb 19    GEORGETOWN SECOND DAY

Hello boys & girls.

Our second day (Wednesday) in Georgetown, KY was fun. Toured WinStar Farms, which boards and trains racehorses (mostly stallions), and conducts breeding and sales operations too. See the picture below of Mom with the 2017 Kentucky Derby winner, Always Dreaming. We managed to avoid stepping in the horse poop.  Ate one of the best hangabers EVER, the Big Blue Burger, in Midway, KY at a place called Wallace Station. Reminded me of PM Park in Clear Lake. Ancient and atmospheric.

Returned to Georgetown for a self-guided walking tour of historic Georgetown, where many of the buildings are > a century old. Took a break with Irish brews at Slainte Public House. After a short late afternoon nap had a fab dinner at Rodney’s On Broadway. The restaurant is in an old mansion; reminded me of Forepaugh’s in St. Paul. I had short ribs. Mom had a peanut butter sammy.

I love you all.

The Old Horse Breeding Authority

****

Feb 20  HELLO FROM STOCKBRIDGE

Greetings boys & girls,

Drove 415 miles through lots of snow and sleet to get from Georgetown to Stockbridge, Georgia. It’s about 15 miles south of Atlanta. I used to think Chicago traffic was the worst, but metro Hotlanta’s congestion gives Chitown a run for the dubious title.

For those of you keeping score at home, we ate lunch at a Chick Fillet in Cleveland, Tennessee. 

Tonight we ate din din at The Bridge Grill & Oyster Bar in Stockton. Mom had oysters while I had a shrimp poor boy.  Their beer selection was fair to partly cloudy.  The waitress called us “honey,” “love,” “lovie” and “darlin,” among others.

Our main objective for the day was to get past Hotlanta. Mission accomplished! Tomorrow: Finally Florida!!

I love you all.

The World’s Greatest Driver

****

Feb 21    HELLO FROM LAKE CITY

Hello boys and girls,

No, not Lake City, Minny Hota; Lake City, FLORIDA.

We drove 270 miles from Stockbridge to get here late Friday afternoon.  Lake City is about 45 miles south of the state line.  The drive was easy, all interstate with no bad weather.  The interstates in GA and FL are at least 3 lanes in each directIon. Trucks must stay in the two right lanes. That is a great law; must have been passed by Republicans!

The temp finally hit 50+ degrees for the first time anywhere on our trip when we got near Macon, which is in the middle of Georgia.  It's also home to the Allman Brothers Band.  I know you (especially Michael) are curious as to where we ate lunch, so I will tell you: Tifton, a medium size city in southern Georgia, named after former BSM President Bob Tift.  We tried Steak 'n' Shake, which is real big in the South.  It was surprisingly good.  We both had boigahs and shakes.

Once in Lake City we didn’t waste much time heading to a tap room, Halpatter, which is Seminole for “alligator.”  I had IPAs and MC had an IPA and a cream ale. All four veddy veddy good. From there we went to Marion Street Bistro, the hippest and busiest place in town for dinner. Decent food but horrible service. I had sheemp n’ grits. Mom had a flat bread.

Lake City claims to have a historic downtown. What a joke. Nothing but 3 bars and the fire department. Makes downtown St. Paul look like the Vegas Strip.

Finished the night by going back to Halpatter, where a band from Geogia called Pine Box Dwellers was doing Dylan.

I love you all.

The Old Pitter Patterer

****

Feb 22    LAKE CITY SECOND DAY

Hello boys & girls,

For the record I thought I’d tell you about day # 2 (Saturday) in Lake City. Ever heard of Stephen Foster? He is one of the greatest music composers in American history. He wrote Oh Susanna, My Old Kentucky Home, Swanny River, Jeanie With The Light Brown Hair, and 250 other songs in the 19th century. Most songs were about the South even though he was from Pittsburgh. We went to the Foster Museum which is the centerpiece of a beautiful regional park in his honor. Inside the museum are dioramas which show a scene from ten of Foster’s songs. One of the most impressive things I’ve ever seen in a museum.

Ate lunch in Fat Belly’s, a back woods BBQ joint. Both the Foster Museum and Fat Belly’s are in a little nearby town called White Springs.

Then we drove back to LC and went on a hike along Alligator Lake. I will send a picture I took of Mom there.

Finished the day with dinner at Phish Tales. Every “f” on their menu (and website) is spelled “ph.” I had blackened mahi mahi. Mom had prime rib.

I will only bore you with one more report. Thanks for your warmth and compassion. I love you all. 

The Old Stephen Phoster Phan

****

Feb 23    HELLO FROM HOLMES BEACH

Hello boys & girls,

This is the final installment of my exciting Road Trip series. Before we left Lake City yesterday we decided to treat ourselves to a Dunkin Donuts greftas. Then we drove 221 miles to Holmes Beach. All interstate until you get to Bradenton. Then about 17 miles of driving under 45 mph.

For you statistics freaks out there, here is the poop:

Distance from SLP to HB via the route we took = 1,728 miles.
Total miles driven, including tooling around seeing the sights, driving to restaurants, etc. = 1,881 miles.  [Note: Fort Myers is another 120 miles south of Holmes Beach.]

Our condo is a block from the beach in a residential neighborhood, very close to a popular burger joint called Skinny’s and right across the street from the rear of Publix. The unit is vey nice, with two bedrooms and two bathrooms. Having my own bathroom is huge; that means I can splash as much as I wah!  Best of all, there are two lanais, one on either side of the unit. The only negative is that our unit is on the third floor, 29 steps up. (Yes, I counted.)  That is a tough climb for a geezer like your old man.

Last night we walked to a bar/pizza joint 2 blocks away, Solo’s. Struck up conversations with the regulars and watched the first period of the Wild-Blues game. Their tap beer selection was horse kah kah, but their bottle inventory was EK. In case you’re curious I had two Goose Island IPAs and one Laguinitas IPA. Mom had wine.  I have a feeling we’ll be back.

Have a Red Letter Week. Always enjoy pix of the Gorgeous Creatures and the Four Legged Creatures, especially those I can view more than once or twice, if you get my drift.

Greetings to all. Peace, love, harmony and tranquility.

The Old Lanai Lover

********

Mar 8    HELLO FROM MARIETTA

Hello.  Here is an abbreviated update on our travels. We drove 612 miles today from our Fort Myers condo to Marietta, which is a suburb of Hotlanta on the north end of its metro area. The Florida and Georgia interstates are filled with horrendous drivers. Atlanta has horrible traffic. Glad to be through there tonight so we don’t have to face it tomorrow.

For lunch we had a picnic of leftover egg salad sammiches at a rest area near Ashburn, Georgia. For dinner we ate quesadillas at a Mexican joint called Pappasito's near our hotel. Mom thought it was great. I thought it was okay.

Heading for Paducah tomorrow. Love to all. Miss you all.

The Old Grumpy Guy

****

Mar 9    HELLO FROM PADUCAH

Hello boys & girls,

You have been sitting with your phones, awaiting this update. Relax... Here it is.

We drove 369 miles to this city right across the Ohio River from the land of my peeps. I was worried about driving around Nashville, but after getting good navigation tips from a guy in a travel information center on how best to do it, no probzlemzskiez.

Lunch was a fish fillet + shamrock shake, at Mac & Don’s in Cadiz, KY.  Our first stop in Paducah was Dry Ground Brewery where we sucked down some EK hazies and pales. Mom, the U of M grad, chose a trippel for her THIRD brew.

Dinner at Max’s Wood Fire Grill In downtown Paducah. I had jambalaya. Grade = A, but a dubious practice regarding the prices on their menu. Mom had cavatappi.

We were going to stay in Paducah two nights, but The Boss now says one.

We are now back in our motel room. Mom just finished watching The Voice and is now watching Manifest. If I am lucky enough to make it to purgatory, it will not be worse.

Keep it light. Keep it mellow. Wash your hands as if you just handled jalapeño peppers and were now going to put in your contact lenses.  (Got that from Jenna Bush.)  Hello to the spouses, the Gorgeous Creatures and the four legged friends.

The Old Kin Tuck Traveler.

****

Mar 10    HELLO FROM SOUTH BELOIT

Hello. We drove 436 miles to get from Paducah to SBI. All but 10 of those miles were in Illinois.

We started the day with greftas at Kirchhoff’s, a deli in downtown Paducah.  We each had a bacon & cheese croissant. Quite suck-you-lant. Right next door through an opening in a shared wall is Etcetera, a funky coffee shop which shares space with a small clothing store. It’s the kind of place SLP needs for its fledgling downtown in the Walker/Lake hood. Then spent 2 hours in the National Quilt Museum. I surprised myself by thinking it was great. I will send a picture or two. The artistry is amazeballs. (Is that Jill’s term?)

I hate to say it, but Illinois is a very long, boring state. Flatter than a mah-hmm. Not much to look at except for the southern quarter which is heavily forested. My favorite town name is Effingham. Lunch was Cheeseboogers at Culver’s in Mount Vernon, a medium size burg in southern Illinois. 

Couldn’t get a room in Rockford for < $200 due to high school basketball and wrestling tournaments in the area — price gouging? — so we drove 15 minutes up the pike to South Beloit. Had spagootz and meatsataballza in a super little Italian restaurant here called Anna Maria’s. Talked to the co-owner cook, a nice Italiano of the female persuasion. Let the women play through!

Should be home tomorrow afternoon. We will have been gone 24 days. Looking forward to seeing all o’ yuz.

The Old Paisano

****

Mar 11    HELLO FROM ST. LOUIS PARK

Hello boys & girls,

While it is true that less than three of you inquired as to whether I would be offering a final installment of my round trip road adventures with Momma Cuan, there may be a completist among you whom I would not want to let down. As you probably know, a completist feels compelled to own or experience every single one of a series of things (for lack of a better word within my limited vocabulary), often for no other reason than to come full circle, as it were.  For example, I have no burning desire to visit Connecticut except for the fact that it is one of only three states in which I have never set foot.  (The other two are West Virginia and Hawaii, both of which I would very much enjoy visiting.) Another personal example is the TV show Lost. I thought the first two or three seasons were very good. The fourth and fifth seasons showed signs of mediocrity, so much so that toward the end of the fifth season the lazy writing made it apparent the whole endeavor was falling apart. Nevertheless I decided to endure the sixth and final season in the interest of completeness. Shame on me. The final season was the worst of them all.

I can’t leave you wondering if we ever made it home from South Beloit. Spoiler Alert: We did!

The hardest part about driving through Cheese Land on a Wednesday morning is keeping the mph within a reasonable level above the speed limit. Seven above is about all I’m willing to risk.  The Wisconsin Highway Patrol is notorious for setting speed traps along the interstate. Those guys are sneaky devils, hiding under bridges and on medians at the end of down slopes. I’m happy to report that on this trip I did manage to avoid the long arm of the law.

As we approached Eau Claire we started to get hungry and decided to bypass several McDonald's while patiently hoping there’d be a Culver’s.  We eventually saw a sign indicating Culver’s was off an exit ramp a few miles beyond Eau Claire. It wasn’t until we actually took the exit that we saw a second sign revealing Culver’s was 3.5 miles away. We should have returned immediately to the interstate but by this time we were really craving Culver’s. To make a long story short, we drove ten miles out of our way on a country road and never found the Culver’s. We ended up settling for Mac & Don’s west of Eau Claire after all.

We hit Minneapolis at 2:15, not early enough to avoid westbound rush hour traffic on I-94.  On second thought the traffic snarl is like a permanent condition more than merely rush hour.  I opted to exit at Riverside, then zig zagged our way home through south Minny and around Lake Of The Isles. We pulled into the QE driveway at exactly 3:00.  Our driveway is 320 miles from South Beloit.

The route home was 1737 miles from Fort Myers, compared to the 1848 miles I drove to get there. That is the difference between driving through Paducah in western Kentucky versus driving through Lexington in eastern Kentucky. The former is a hypotenuse route; the latter is more of a right angle.  In total we put 3791 miles on our car during the twenty-four days we were gone. Some people might call us crazy for driving instead of flying, but our theory is that the journey provides opportunities and memories which a flyer would miss.

I love you all.

The Old Completist

Movie Review: "Ford v Ferrari"

"Ford v Ferrari": B+.  I'll admit I had a few reservations about spending good money to see Ford v Ferrari.  First of all, I found the film's title to be rather blah.  But then I remembered you can't judge a book by its cover, so the same precept must apply to movies.  Secondly, I'm not a big auto racing fan.  Watching guys making left turns for two hours is not a big turn on for me, even if they are approaching the speed of sound.  But then I remembered the key race is LeMans where the unique, eight and a-half mile track requires right turns as well; plus, the event is an all-day-and-night proposition.  Thirdly, I was concerned that the automotive jargon would pose a language barrier.  I don't know a piston from a crankshaft or a shock from a strut.  But then I figured this immensely popular movie is probably being viewed, and praised, by other people like me whose mechanical know-how amounts to being able to read a dip stick.  Oh, and regarding that "good money" I was hesitant to part with?  My ticket cost a grand total of $2.50 at the Hopkins Theater.

Ford v Ferrari is a buddy movie of sorts, and the two leading men are nearly perfect.  Matt Damon is Carroll Shelby, known among industry professionals as a world class automobile designer.  Christian Bale is Ken Miles, one of a select group of drivers whose uncanny, intangible instincts give him an accurate assessment of how his car will perform under race conditions when he calls on his machine to rise to the next level. Miles is also an astute strategist, banking on his unmatched big race experience to know when to lie back and when to throttle his adversary.

The story abounds with villains, or at least men who are at odds with the aspirations of our two heroes.  My favorite adversaries, naturally, are the Italians, led by Enzo Ferrari (Remo Girone).  He negotiates with Ford Motor Company's representatives, led by none other than future Ford president and Chrysler Corporation CEO Lee Iaccoca (Jon Bernthal).  Ford is trying to form a merger with Ferrari.  The proposed deal falls apart ostensibly over post-merger control issues relating to future races, but it's possible if not likely that Enzo is simply playing Iacocca to get a better deal from Fiat.  The sly, cunning Enzo not only dismisses the Ford representatives with a waive of his hand, but hurls insults at its CEO, Henry Ford II (Tracy Letts), aka "Deuce," who has remained home in Detroit.  When word of Enzo's personal invective gets back to Deuce, its Game On.

Deuce and Iacocca are counting on Shelby to steer Ford's racing division to international glory.  Shelby is reluctant to take the job mostly because the corporate bureaucracy would interfere with how Shelby prefers to conduct business.  When Deuce assures Shelby that he will only have to answer to one executive, Shelby accepts the challenge.   Shelby naively assumes that the one big shot will be Deuce himself. Wrong. Enter the conniving Leo Beebe (Josh Lucas), an executive vice president of Ford.  The "one guy" Deuce promised to Shelby as his only boss turns out to be Beebe, who throws one roadblock after another into Shelby and Miles' way.

The film is based on the true story of how Shelby and Miles combine to help Ford Motor Company reach the pinnacle of international auto racing, putting it in the same lofty stratum as Ferrari.  Therefore, when director James Mangold chronicles many singular moments and incidences which seem too far fetched, we wonder if those things really happened, or if they're products of Hollywood fiction whose purpose is to add to the intensity of their respective scenes.  For example, when Shelby needs to convince Deuce that not just any ol' race car driver can get the job done, but rather someone with the rare talent and experience of Miles, Shelby takes Deuce on a death-defying high speed chase around an airport tarmac.  Deuce, a proud and cocky "suit," is reduced to tears of fear.  It is no doubt an exciting minute or two on film, and provides Letts an opportunity to show some range versus the impression he had theretofore exhibited playing the part of Deuce, but I doubt the race car romp actually happened. I also seriously doubt that Shelby would go so far as to wager ownership of his own company, Shelby American, on the outcome of the Daytona 500, but in Ford v Ferrari, that's what happens.  Finally, do racers hurtling side-by-side at speeds exceeding two hundred miles an hour really stare each other down making menacing faces?  Miles and Ferrari's driver, Lorenzo Bandini (Francesco Bauco), make a habit of it.  Well, their focus may have been lacking but at least they weren't texting, perhaps only because cell phones were still thirty years into the future.

It turns out I should not have worried about being clueless regarding the use of automotive intricacies.  Director Mangold must have had viewers like me in mind when he chose the kind of racing dilemmas to film.  For example, when Miles can't get the door of his racing car to stay closed, one of the engineers in the pit crew, Phil Remington (Ray McKinnon), bludgeons the door shut with a mallet.  Problem solved.  That I could understand!  When there are problems with Miles' brakes, the crew simply replaces the entire brake system rather than extricating and replacing the faulty part.  If you, the viewer, knew nothing at all about the innards of brake systems, it made no difference here.  There are continual cautious references to 7,000 RPM.  We are alerted that if a driver forces his engine to exceed that threshold, expect bad things to happen.  Foreshadowing?  Again, easily decipherable, especially since the camera shows us the RPM level on the dashboard plenty of times.

There are a smattering of minor negatives which detract from the quality of Ford v Ferrari.  How many times do we need to see the drivers stomping on their accelerators or manipulating their gear shifts? There is an overdose of Miles' family reacting to the race they are watching on their little televisions back home.  And most importantly, the last ten minutes of this 152 minute movie are arguably trite and unnecessary.  Nevertheless, I was very impressed with the performances of Damon and especially Bale.  Whatever deficiencies may be present, I can say without reservation that I was entertained, thanks to a large extent to those two gifted actors.

Twelfth Annual Movie Ratings Recap

Isn't it something that the three most eagerly awaited film events of the year all take place on the same day?  That day is today!  You can place these in any order of importance you feel is justified, but in chronological order they line up as follows:

* The Quentin Chronicle's annual Movie Ratings Recap.

* The Red Carpet entrance into Hollywood's Dolby Theatre, where the Academy Awards ceremony will take place.

* The Academy Awards ceremony itself.

It's kind of like Super Bowl Sunday, Final Four Monday and Game 7 of the World Series all rolled into one.

Last year I lamented the fact that my attendance at movie theaters had sunk to an all time low of thirteen times.  I wrote in my February 28 MRR, "My wish for the coming year is that movie makers become more attuned to the fact that the baby boomer generation has an unquenched appetite for down-to-earth stories without the necessity of super heroes with supernatural powers, comic book characters, over-the-top special effects, locker room humor, one dimensional characters (many of whom are armed), and story lines which don't come close to passing the Logic Test."  The bad news is that, generally, Hollywood and its foreign counterparts have failed to heed the call.  Most of the previews and advertisements I've seen for the past year's films are aimed at a demographic of which, sadly, I am not a part.  The good news is that, notwithstanding my continued disappointment with what the studios have offered for consumption, I did manage to take in fifteen movies during the twelve month period which ended January 31, 2020.  According to my Norf Dakoter high school math, that's a 15% uptick over last year's tally.

Following custom, I have listed those fifteen films in descending order of my ratings, including within each grade level.  I've also listed the month of my review.

A:

Linda Ronstadt: The Sound Of My Voice  (September '19)

Knives Out  (December '19)

A-:

The Highwaymen  (March '19)

Love Them First: Lessons From Lucy Laney Elementary  (June '19)

B+:

Vice  (February '19)

1917  (January '20)

The Lighthouse  (November '19)

B:

Hotel Mumbai  (April '19) 

Rocket Man  (August '19)

The Quiet One  (July '19)

B-:

Booksmart  (June '19)

Uncut Gems  (January '20)

Long Shot  (May '19)

C+:

Little Women  (January '20)

C:

After The Wedding  (August '19)