Whenever the subjects of presidential administrations and presidential politics are broached, I tend to think of famous quotations uttered (sometimes allegedly) by US presidents and other celebrities from the annals of American history. I have always been fascinated by famous quotes. They play a big part of our nation's legacy. One of the ironic things about movie quotes is that some of the most famous ones were never actually uttered on screen. For example, despite popular belief, in Casablanca neither Humphrey Bogart nor Ingrid Bergman ever says "Play it again, Sam." Bergman does say, "Play it once, Sam, for old times' sake..." Likewise, impressionists of Cary Grant are fond of using "Judy, Judy, Judy!" In fact, Grant never spoke those words in any of his dozens of films, even though it does sound like something one of his characters would have said. The same might be true of historical quotes. Did Paul Revere ever literally proclaim, "The British are coming"?
During my eleven years of teaching, I created hundreds of tests and quizzes for my students. I almost never used pre-fab tests, preferring instead to write my own to fit my expectations for the kids. (In all humility, I also figured I was better at it than the guys and gals at Scott Foresman, Houghton Mifflin, or wherever.) Math tests and quizzes were the easiest to draft, and by far the easiest to grade. I particularly enjoyed composing literature tests on novels which the students read together as a class. A typical test would have the following sections: (i) straight forward fact questions, to get at the who, what, where, etc.; (ii) matching quotes which were peculiar to or identified with certain characters with those characters; (iii) matching descriptions of characters to those characters; (iv) rearranging a series of four or five (or more) events into chronological order; and of course, (v) a couple of essay questions to separate the wheat from the chaff.
Momma Cuandito is a volunteer at Fashions On Main Street
(aka Learning In Style), a school run by the Sisters Of St. Joseph for
immigrant adults. The primary focus is on English, math and computer
skills. The teachers at Fashions periodically assist the students in
preparing for citizenship tests. I have seen many of the questions, and
believe me, the average American-born adult, including yours truly,
would not want to take the citizenship test that our government requires
of our immigrants. The test is replete with obscure dates, rules, laws
and other minutia.
As hard as it is to believe, the US Department Of
Homeland Security has not, to this point, asked me to create a revised
test for citizenship. However, I expect that news of my fame as a Test
Creator Extraordianaire will eventually trickle over to Washington, DC,
and at that point the request for my help will be forthcoming. In
anticipation of that day, and recalling my years as a Boy Scout during
which we were trained to always be prepared, I have already written a
rough draft of a section of the test, concentrating on famous quotes
from American presidents (keeping in mind the caveat discussed in the
second paragraph above). It seems to me that any immigrant aspiring to
become a US citizen should be able to match most of the following quotes
with the persons who said them. My test is much easier (read: fairer)
than what's currently being used, and I am the epitome of fairness. I'm
pretty confident that most of the readers of this blog will achieve a
perfect score of 16.
One of the many (?) benefits of reading my blog is
that you get an advanced peek at that portion of my test. Actually,
come to think of it, the NSA has probably already covertly tapped into
my computer, and the patriotic spies are reading this as I type. Good
luck to those of you proceeding to take the test. By the way, it's
pass/fail, with a score of 10 correct being the line of demarcation.
JOHNNY ROCK'S CITIZENSHIP TEST - Oral US History
Directions: Match the famous quote with the American president who uttered it.
___ 1. "I cannot tell a lie."
___ 2. "Eternal vigilance is the price of liberty."
___ 3. "Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation..."
___ 4. "After all, the chief business of the American people is business."
___ 5. "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."
___ 6. "In the councils of government, we must guard
against the acquisition of unwarranted influence, whether sought or
unsought, by the military-industrial complex."
___ 7. "Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country."
___ 8. "I shall not seek, and I will not accept, the nomination of my party for another term as your President."
___ 9. "I am not a crook."
___ 10. "I've looked on many women with lust. I've committed adultery in my heart many times."
___ 11. "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall."
___ 12. "I did not have sexual relations with that woman..."
___ 13. "Mission accomplished."
___ 14. "If you like your health care plan, you can keep it."
___ 15. "What difference at this point does it make?"
___ 16. "The buck stops here."
***
A. Abraham Lincoln
B. Barack Obama
C. Calvin Coolidge
D. Dwight D. Eisenhower
E. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
F. George W. Bush
G. George Washington
H. Harry S. Truman
I. Hillary Rodham Clinton
J. Jimmy Carter
K. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
L. Lyndon Baines Johnson
M. Richard Milhous Nixon
N. Ronald Reagan
O. Thomas Jefferson
P. William Jefferson Clinton
***
You may have noticed that the quotes above are placed in chronological order, except
for the last one. As the blogger, I reserve the right to do that for
dramatic juxtapositioning. Outside the context of a blog, I probably
would have mixed up the chronology of the quotes.
Answers: 1-G; 2-O; 3-A; 4-C; 5-E; 6-D; 7-K; 8-L; 9-M; 10-J; 11-N; 12-P; 13-F; 14-B; 15-I; 16-H
In this context it appears we are getting dumber. You might be on to something! However it may have started earlier:
ReplyDelete1: "Now, by God, I'll see if I can't cut up this turkey without farting."
2: “Well, I learned a lot….I went down to (Latin America) to find out from them and (learn) their views. You’d be surprised. They’re all individual countries.”
3: "Things are more like they are now than they ever were before."
1-A; 2-N; 3-D